Lilting Upward

I've been around the world now. I am a world traveler. Therefore, I can now confirm that people are people everywhere I've been. I've not been everywhere, but my suspicion is that people are people everywhere people are even if I haven't been there. I assume that is so even in places that seem hostile toward human life, like the Middle East.

I traveled to London, England. It is several hundred miles from my home. I thought it would be magical, but actually it is just old. I wonder if that is what growing up is like. I've only done so much of it myself. As a child I thought growing up was some ordinary thing that everyone did if they lived long enough, but I don't know if that is true. Some people choose to live in a fantasy where they are and will always be the center of the universe. They never expand past the idea that there is something more important than protecting their own sense of self. I'm only starting to get a sense of that myself. I am, in fact, beginning to grow up.

In the story of Peter Pan the character called Wendy is told she must grow up. When Peter Pan finds this out, he invites her to Neverland where she will never have to grow up. She follows Peter and brings her brothers, John and Michael, with her. They encounter wonderful things while in Neverland, but they finally decide it is time for them to go home. When they do, Wendy decides it is okay to grow up. Her life doesn't end just because she has accepted responsibility for it, and she will always have her memories of Neverland to keep her company.

I am constantly struck by the circular nature of life. The patterns in my life, at least, are very curly. They wind, and bend, and twist, and I often don't know where they will end up, until I see something familiar, then I wonder if they are simply repeating themselves. There is something comforting about a repeating pattern though, so there's that.

One pattern that will be repeating soon is my attendance of college. I will be entering my third year, but it will be more like my first year of achieving credits that actually count toward a degree. After graduating from the PATP in May of this year I was ready to take a break from school. Then studying abroad reminded me how much I enjoy learning, and dread the pressure of having to perform for a teacher. It is both a struggle, and an opportunity to grow my character. I'm interested to see how I grow this year. I will be taking all academic classes, and my brother is moving away to Hawaii, so I'll be pretty much on my own most of the time. I wonder how that will go.

I'm single again, as of February, but we have three dogs now. They don't need much attention. I still have a gym membership, so I expect I will be making more use of it over the next few months than I have over the past few. Bring on the discipline. Bring on the good habits. Bring on the loneliness.

This is not as good as the performance I saw in London, but this is still a great song.